Divorce Mediation FAQ: Child Custody Questions

Uncontested Divorce Mediation

Posted September 28, 2026

Child custody can be one of the most important and emotional issues parents face during divorce. In Colorado, the legal system calls it the allocation of parental responsibilities, which includes parenting time and decision-making responsibilities. A parenting plan can outline when kids spend time with each parent, how big decisions are made and other details to help parents navigate life with children after divorce.

For parents who can work towards an agreement, divorce mediation gives them a chance to discuss these issues outside of a contested court hearing. Instead of having a judge decide what should happen, parents work together with a mediator to come up with solutions that meet their kids’ needs and the reality of their schedules.

Here are some common questions parents have about child custody and divorce mediation.

How Can Divorce Mediation Help With a Parenting Plan?

Mediation isn’t about who “wins” custody. It’s a structured setting for parents to discuss the issues that need to be resolved.

A parenting plan may cover parenting time, holidays, vacations, transportation, communication and responsibility for big decisions around education and healthcare. Colorado’s parenting-plan process allows parents to address both parenting time and decision-making responsibilities.

During mediation, parents can consider their kids’ ages and needs as well as school schedules, extracurricular activities, work obligations, geographical distance and other practical factors.

Most importantly, the focus should be on the best interests of the children, not automatically trying to split parenting time equally.

Can a Divorce Mediator Help Us Create a Co-Parenting Plan?

A mediator can help parents work through the practical questions of co-parenting.

There is no one parenting schedule that works for every family. Parents with young kids have different considerations than parents of teenagers. Work schedules, school locations, travel, extracurricular activities, holidays and the distance between households can all impact what’s practical.

Divorce mediation gives parents a chance to discuss these issues and create a parenting plan that works for their situation.

The mediator facilitates those discussions but doesn’t make the decisions for the parents. Colorado’s Office of Dispute Resolution describes mediation as a process in which a neutral third party helps participants identify issues, needs, interests and possible solutions while leaving the ultimate agreement to the parties.

Can Divorce Mediation Create a Flexible Parenting Plan?

Yes. Parents can consider foreseeable changes when creating their parenting plan.Kids grow older, school schedules change, extracurricular activities start and stop, and parents change jobs or move. A thoughtful parenting plan can outline expectations and a process for dealing with future disagreements or changes.

But flexibility doesn’t mean a court-approved parenting plan can be ignored. Once a parenting plan becomes a court order, it’s enforceable. If circumstances change significantly or parents can no longer agree, they may need to file a formal modification.

Will My Children Be in Divorce Mediation?

Usually parents shouldn’t assume their children will be in mediation.

The Colorado Judicial Branch specifically advises parents not to bring children to mediation unless the mediator has approved it in advance.

Parents can still consider their children’s needs, schedules, relationships, ages and developmental circumstances when creating a parenting plan without putting children in the middle of parental negotiations.

In some cases additional professionals or court procedures may be necessary when a child’s perspective needs to be considered. The right approach depends on the family’s situation.

Can a Divorce Mediator Decide Who Gets the Children?

No. A mediator can’t award custody or take children away from either parent.

The mediator’s role is to remain neutral and help parents work towards agreements. If parents reach an agreement, their parenting plan can be submitted to the court for approval. If they can’t resolve certain issues, those will have to be decided by the court.

Colorado courts can establish parenting time and decision-making responsibilities when parents can’t agree themselves.

What If There Are Safety Concerns?

Safety concerns should be handled differently than regular disagreements about parenting schedules.

If there are concerns about domestic violence, abuse, neglect, threats, substance misuse or another issue that affects a child’s safety, parents should seek legal guidance about their options. Depending on the situation, mediation may not be appropriate or additional safeguards may be necessary.

A mediator doesn’t impose supervised parenting time or other restrictions. Those restrictions require parental agreement or court involvement.

So parents should disclose significant safety concerns before starting the divorce mediation process rather than assuming they can be resolved like regular scheduling disagreements.

Can a Parenting Plan Address Relocation?

A parenting plan can address travel, transportation, communication and where children spend their parenting time. But relocation can get complicated when a proposed move would significantly impact an existing parenting schedule. Parents considering a big move shouldn’t assume that a provision in their parenting plan automatically means relocation will be allowed.

If a move would impact an existing court-ordered parenting plan, parents will need to agree to a new plan or file a modification through the proper legal process. Addressing a potential relocation early gives parents time to figure out how parenting time, school schedules, transportation and other responsibilities would be affected.

We Disagree About Parenting Terms

Disagreement doesn’t mean mediation has failed.

One of the purposes of divorce mediation is to give parents a structured way to identify where they agree, where they disagree and what compromises might be possible. A mediator can help clarify the issues and keep the discussions focused but can’t force either parent to accept certain terms.

Parents may agree on some parenting issues and leave others unresolved. Colorado’s mediation guidance specifically recognizes that mediation can still be useful when the parties resolve only part of their dispute.

If an agreement can’t be reached on a big issue the court will have to decide it.

Creating a Parenting Plan Through Divorce Mediation

A good parenting plan isn’t one that splits every responsibility exactly in half. It’s one that reflects the children’s best interests and gives both parents clear expectations about parenting time, decision-making, communication and other responsibilities.

Divorce mediation gives parents more control over developing those arrangements rather than leaving every unresolved issue for a judge to decide. Split Simple’s mediation process includes discussion of parenting plan options when applicable and preparation of the parenting plan and other documents needed to finalize the divorce.

For parents the goal isn’t to create a perfect schedule that anticipates every possible change. It’s to develop a practical framework that provides stability for their children, establishes clear responsibilities and gives the family a workable foundation for life after divorce.