6 Things To Consider When Going Through A Divorce
Uncontested Divorce Mediation
Posted March 9, 2022
Getting a divorce can really change your life. Not only that, it can change your children’s lives. For this reason, you should do everything that you can to finalize your divorce as quickly as possible. One way to do this is by going through mediation, instead of the court system. It allows you and your ex to sit down and hammer out the issues with your lawyers instead of fighting it out in court.
So, what things do you need to talk about when going through mediation? Here are some of the most common concerns and things that you need to figure out how to split up.
How to handle the situation until the divorce is finalized.
Many couples live together while they are going through a divorce. Others choose to have one person move out of the home until everything gets settled. However, paying for two homes can become expensive, while you are trying to get through the divorce. You should create a budget together so that everyone has a place to live and money to spend while mediation is going on.
One of the hardest things about divorce is deciding what to do about the children. You need to figure out who should have the children and when. You also need to discuss visitation with other family members, including grandparents. You can’t forget to talk about holidays, birthdays, and special occasions. Will you split holidays or do your best to celebrate them together?
It is also important to talk about how you are going to handle things that come up pertaining to the children. Will one parent get to make most of the decisions or should all decisions be made together? As you figure out child custody, you need to talk about child support. If one person has the children more than the other, child support should be a part of the conversation. Even if it is not, you need to discuss how you are going to split bills when it comes to them. Is one of you going to buy clothing? What about health insurance and medical bills? What about college? These things should be discussed and written down, so there is no confusion in the future.
You are going to need to decide whether or not one person deserves spousal support. If one decided to stay home with the children, you may want to support her as she adjusts to being a single parent and having to go back to work to help support her family. If one person supported the other during the marriage (such as one going to school while the other worked), spousal support should be discussed.
Then, if one person is entitled to get some help, you need to talk about how much support that person needs, as well as how long you should do it. You may just feel like the one person should be supported for a few months while he or she adjusts to a new life. Some spousal support lasts for years, up until one gets remarried.
Your property together.
You are going to need to get a list together of everything that you own jointly. While your home is probably the most expensive part, you can’t forget about vacation homes and other real estate that you may own together.
While doing so, you should also start a list of everything that you own together. This may include the furniture in your home, the amount of money that you have in savings, and vehicles that you own. Don’t forget about your retirement funds, as well as any stocks, bonds, and funds that you may have acquired over the years. If you own a business together, you will need to do the same for that.
Your property alone.
There are going to be certain things that belong only to you. That may include things that you brought to the marriage. You should also think about gifts that were given to you alone. You may have some family heirlooms and other items that are special only to you. If you own certain pieces of artwork or jewelry, these should be brought up in the discussion.
Get your documents in order.
Before you even meet with a lawyer, you need to get your documents in order. You should collect the following:
- Marriage license
- A prenuptial agreement (if you have one)
- Real estate (deeds, appraisals, mortgage)
- Tax returns for the last few years
- Your income, as well as your ex’s
- Bank statements
- Retirement Accounts
- Stock portfolios and options
- Property tax statements
- Monthly bills, including credit card statements, utility bills, etc.
- Health insurance information
- Life insurance policies
- Automobile insurance policies
- Wills and end of life information, including the power of attorneys and advanced health care directives
Making the decision to split with your spouse can be overwhelming. There are so many things to consider, from where you are going to live while the divorce is happening, as well as starting to think about what your next chapter of your life will look like. However, before that happens, you need to have some serious conversations about how to split up your possessions.
You also need to figure out what is best for your children. You need to figure out if you want joint custody or if one person should have the children more than the other. This also brings into it child support and how you should split up their expenses. You also need to figure out how to discuss any problems with your children. Should one parent make all of the decisions or do you need to learn to work together to figure out what needs to be done?
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Then, you need to start to divide your possessions. You need to decide if the house should be sold or if one person gets the house. What about dividing up the furniture and other possessions? You shouldn’t forget about retirement funds, stocks, and bonds. Everything needs to be divided evenly, so that everyone is happy.
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