6 Things Most Denver Divorce Attorneys Aren’t Mentioning

Uncontested Divorce Mediation

Posted June 23, 2021

The first thing that most people do when planning a divorce is to consult with a divorce attorney. Here in Denver, divorce attorneys are ready to advise, offer perspective, and get spouses ready for a long battle over divorce terms. This is how the typical divorce industry works and divorcees are obliged to trust their attorneys. After all, the attorneys are the ones with the legal expertise to draw up your Denver divorce mediation agreement and submit it to the court. You consult with them about your goals and they tell you what to expect from the process. But your typical divorce attorney tends to leave a few details out.

There are more than a few insights into the divorce process that don’t fit into the typical lawyer-vs-lawyer approach. For Denver spouses looking to streamline the divorce process instead of battling over every couch and ottoman, these insights could save you months of time and thousands of dollars. So what won’t a typical divorce attorney tell you that you need to know?

1. You Don’t Want to See a Court Room

In the movies, divorces are dramatic courtroom productions. The wronged spouse accuses the wronging spouse. The accused defends themselves, both throw around a lot of evidence: This is not where you want to end up. Court divorces are longer, more expensive, and have numerous other downsides. The most important being that control is out of your hands. Once your divorce goes into the courtroom, the judge gets to decide on your final terms – not you.

Most divorces can be taken care of by ‘settling’, or finalizing terms and submitting the divorce without court intervention. There’s probably no need for a big combative court case and even if you want to fight about terms, keep it out of the courtroom so it stays in your control.

2. You Probably Won’t Get Everything You Want

Be wary of a lawyer who promises too much satisfaction. Divorces are rarely fully satisfying and usually, both spouses compromise to achieve the mutual goal of functional separation. You can’t “get it all”, often because the actual laws of the nation and state prevent usurious divorce terms. A divorce that is too imbalanced without purpose is very likely to be rejected by the court – even if your spouse agrees to the asset split.

You may not get sole custody if your spouse is a fit parent. You may have to choose between the house, car, and bulk of the cash. But with fair negotiations, you can likely get everything you need and many of the things you personally care about by compromising with your spouse.

3. The Long-Term Consequences of What You Want

uncontested divorce mediation

Divorcing spouses often don’t know what’s really the best way to split their assets, custody, etc. What seems like the right choice might have long-term consequences that are less than satisfying. For example “Getting the house” also means taking on the mortgage, property taxes, and bills and covering those costs solo, only on your personal income. Sole custody can lead to less support from a co-parent than shared custody would provide.

It’s common to ask for terms that need to be adapted for legality and practical lifestyle purposes. Before you ask for terms, discuss how the terms of your divorce will affect the years after the divorce is concluded – especially concerning finances, expenses, and co-parenting children. No attorney should assure you that you can “get everything” and a good divorce lawyer will give you a more realistic picture of how to expect the split of assets, custody, and so on.

4. Divorce Will Take Longer Than You Expect

Very few divorces take just a few weeks to complete. Most take months, some can take years depending on the motivation and complexity of the separation. Every hour your divorce attorney spends working on your divorce or consulting with you is a billable hour, so a long divorce is an expensive divorce. Some attorneys will gladly let you quibble over negotiation terms to continue collecting those billable hours, but the best strategy for you is a quick, succinct divorce without too many extra hours of negotiation or consultation.

Minimize the cost of divorce delays by allowing time to pass without lawyer consultations. If you’re waiting back for paperwork or a response from your spouse, sit tight until you can have a cost-effective meeting between lawyers to hammer out the next stage of your divorce.

5. Where DIY Really Works in Divorce

If your divorce attorney does all the work for your divorce, you’ll pay in billable hours. But trying to DIY a divorce is also a recipe for court-rejected documents. The happy medium is knowing what aspects of your divorce to ‘DIY’ and which to entrust to a legal professional. The best way to save on a divorce is to gather your own documentation. Request the paperwork from banks, employers, doctors, and other relevant parties. Compile a folder of all the documents and data your lawyer needs to process the divorce.

Any time fact-finding or document gathering is needed, this is where your DIY efforts can save money. Come to each meeting with your divorce lawyer equipped with a portfolio that saves them time, reducing the total cost of your divorce.

6. Divorce Mediation is an Efficient Alternative

Your divorce attorney likely also hasn’t mentioned that Denver divorce mediation is an alternative option to hiring two separate divorce lawyers. The best way to save on your divorce is to hire a single legal professional acting as a mediator between you and your spouse. 

Denver divorce mediation is a three-person system instead of a four-person system. Instead of two spouses and two lawyers, there’s just you, the mediator, and your spouse. Your mediator steps into the role of both divorce attorneys, but with the goal of creating a mutually beneficial document instead of “fighting for” the rights of either side. Divorce mediation is also more affordable because it streamlines the negotiation process in a few short discussions instead of dragging out offers and counter-offers.

Planning a More Efficient Divorce

Are you planning a divorce in the near future? Instead of hiring two separate Denver divorce attorneys, consider Denver divorce mediation instead. A mediator’s goal is to promote a fair and well-built divorce agreement that launches both spouses into new single lives. Instead of an out-of-control court case or a drawn out negotiation, you can come to agreements, draw up the document, and have your divorce submitted in a matter of weeks, not months. For more on Denver divorce mediation services, contact Split Simple today!

Split Simple

1624 Market Street #202

Denver, CO 80202